The Waiting Game

Sometimes I find myself waiting for that moment that will change the direction my life is taking. The moment that brings the event that I'll look back on and say that's where everything started to go right. I'm not sure why I do this.

There are other moments when life is perfect and I couldn't possibly think of anything else I could possibly want, or anywhere else I would rather be. Those are the moments when I feel on top of my game, like nothing could go wrong. It's the memory of those moments that makes this 'waiting place' so much more frustrating.

I also think that the expectation that some 'moment' will just deliver an answer I've been waiting for is misguided. Nothing just gets delivered unless it's been asked for. It's the asking that gives the power to recognize the answer. I know that, but I am doing a poor job of putting into action that which I already know.

It seems the thing I'm getting hung up on is what to ask for. I just don't really know what it is that I want. Can I just ask for direction? I guess I could try. Here it goes.

Aside from family, what is most important to me? I would really like to know this. I don't want to continue down the same path indefinately with the feeling that I only have the career I have to fill space until I find out what it is I really want to do. What living can I carve out for myself and my family that isn't work?

There, it's out there. The answer will come.